Hi Gil,

I do agree that when you give gifts, you should NOT expect something in return. But I also think we humans have a natural tendency to do expect something in return — even if it sometime is such a positive thing as making another person feel better.

Having said that, I think we should also always be aware of the law of reciprocity (popularized by Robert Cialdini). Whenever we receive a gift, we also have a tendency to want to return a favor to them.

I don’t think of it in absolute terms like your friend back in the days, I do think that it’s possible that there really are exceptions to this and that there are instances where people really give a gift without expecting something, but I think it’s a tiny minority of instances.

On an unrelated sidenote (sorry), but what do you use to put the social buttons on the right side of your webpage (RSS, Twitter, technorati, etc.? I love it!

Kind regards,
Jeremy
Jeremy´s last blog ..By: silver fizz

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Well said Jon! It’s so true that many people don’t truly understand, let alone realize, the joy of giving without strings attached. Thanks for the comments!

Gil

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Hi Gil,

Love the stories about gifts and the that EVERYONE wants something in return. Competitive society teaches that you do things to get things. Caring world folks do things to do wonderful things. The most present people, the one’s who treat life as a chance to give gifts, enjoy receiving gifts too.

I just don’t think they go through the calculus of what the gifts they give are worth…beyond the pleasure they get from giving. That’s not naive if it’s truly where your heart is. And, most of us, can tell the difference between generosity without strings and quid pro quos.

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[…] piece of advice was com­ing some­where down the line .  The key word here is con­sis­tent. Exer­cis­ing is one of the sim­plest ways to recharge your mind and spirit. Doing it con­sis­tently is half […]

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Nice tips Gil. Yes we need to take a breath if we under pressure
Latief@AnotherBlogger´s last blog ..Why We Should Linking Our Articles

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[…] you’re telling your­self when some­thing that make your feel bad hap­pens. Is there a more opti­mistic and empow­er­ing story you can tell your­self (and oth­ers) with­out deny­ing […]

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Thanks Anshul, Latief for sharing your views here!

Anshul, you bring up very good points here. Just like there are people who are honest, there are others who want to take something for giving nothing (other than a headache) in return. The creation of a Knowledge Hub to present real facts verified fro authentic sources sounds like a great idea. I’m sure many people around the world will find it extremely useful.

Best Regards and Thanks again for sharing!

Gil

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Great info, thanks for useful article. I’m waiting for more

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Thanks Cynthia! You are so right in that a person can be both and in that depending upon where they are and what specifically they are working on at a particular moment, a person may need to be a leader or need to be a manager. The success of any organization is only possible with many individuals being both a manager and a leader. The important thing is knowing when to be one or the other.

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Hi Gil, great topic!
Here is my 2-cents: (who says you have to be one or the other?)

From the perpective of the confines of the organization’s tangible structures (i.e. processes, methods, corporate policies, metrics, etc.) the manager is the one whose role is to follow that structure and ensure that the employees they manage do so as well, in order to meet the short-term goals set forth for the organization. Their success is measured by how well they keep to that given structure.

Given that same perspective, the leader is the one who transcends the boundaries of the organizational structure and sees the bigger picture of how the organization “could be”, therefore look at the longer term goals. In your quote above “managers do things right, leaders do the right thing”, it enforces the concept that the “right thing” may not be what the current structure of the organization is at the moment, but by “leading” the leader is able to shift and help change the organization to its new “normal structure”. This then becomes the “new organizational structure” by which the managers can manage to and produce the necessary results to succeed at that point in time.

The point here is, we shouldn’t look at trying to be a leader if we are good managers, or trying to manage when we were given the gift of leading. Both aspects of an individual equally contribute to the success the organization. This cycle of constant changing organizational structure is attributed to the visionary leaders, and the implementation of that vision is carried out by the ever meticulous managers.

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